My status is changing from single to... ... attach... ... but I'm still not giving her any commitment & promise. I still keep my pact of we'll talk about it 3mths later. She's giving me lots of attention lately. When I needed those affection attention from my past relationship, didn't quite get it from her, but now I'm not expecting anything from anybody, I'm getting it without the need to ask from her.
My greatest barrier still the age gap. She's so young, I know her feeling will change as she grow. So should I just enjoy this moment of companionship? Let nature take its course... That's the reason I keep my feeling within control. History will not repeat again. This is a promise I gave to all friends & family member, to all those who care for me, who had been with me, supported me all these while. I am not going to fail or disappoint them again or anymore.
In the past, I prostrate a very good image during the beginning when we are together. I hide dark side from them. But this time, I was slowly telling her things from my past. I want her to know the real me. Not only the good side of me, but the weak & ugly side of me as well. I can't control how she feel for me, but I am slowing down.
No doubt I'm enjoying her affectionate attention. I can see from her face, her eyes that she's happy, she's enjoying giving me the attention. I don't want ot think too much at this moment.
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